12 thoughts on “Good idea… now go biblical on them, I hate thieves.

  1. There is nothing worse than a busy 12 hour shift and finding out somebody ate your lunch. Night shift. No cafeteria. He did it All the Time. And thought it was funny. So we got security to alter his badge: no more access to employee areas, including the clean restrooms. 😁

    • yeah, we used to have the same problem when I worked at the VA.
      not only did the asshole steal lunches, he also stole all the ice tea.
      one night he got fucked bigtime. you know that stuff that makes you puke ? well, we put 2 bottles of it in EVERY ice tea in the fridge.
      asshole ended up in the ER where they had to give him something to make it stop. what we heard from the ER staff was he drank 2 bottles of tea before it kicked in. no one touched the fridge after that. story was he puked up everything but his balls.

  2. Lunch thieves are the scum of the earth. My variation is to load my sandwich with ghost peppers. Enjoy, asswipe!

  3. BTDT – having access to college-level chemicals and being buddy-buddy with the biologists can be really useful at times!

    No, you DON’T Need To Know.

    Didn’t have Ghost Pepper availability in the ’70s, sounds like fun! Bake it into homemade bread, right??

  4. Had a guy, years ago that would raid the refrigerator at work for anything nor nailed down. We worked 12 hour shifts, and most would bring in their stuff for the 3 or 4 nightshifts the first night. So you would get to work and realize that you had no food for the night. Not a good thing

    One of my coworkers observed the dates and times of the occurrences, and narrowed it down to a specific crew. He then looked at the crew reports. Identifying the days when a specific person was not at work, and compared it to the days where the food disappeared.
    Now that he had a good idea who the suapect was, he then took action.
    Next night shift, he shows up with a large pizza. He ate half, then put it into the fridge. After the cheese on top had an opportunity to congealed, he pulled it out, and peeled the toppings back, revealing the crust. Out comes a bottle of ipecac syrup, and he proceeded to soak the crust with the ipecac. Once the crust was saturated, he then pulled the congealed cheese and toppings back, and replaced the pizza in the fridge. 8am, the suspect arrives, with no food as per his usual habit. Everyone from the night shift departs. That night, it becomes known that the suspect got suddenly and violently ill during his shift, and had to leave work. The pizza box was retrieved from the fridge and opened. All but about half a slice was gone.
    Never had another problem with food being stolen.

  5. The good old fashion ex-lax chocolate chip cookies or fudge always did the trick way back when too.

  6. A person where I worked did the Ex-lax trick and got fired for making the thief sick. The thief didn’t even get his wrist slapped. He was a protected type person

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