12 thoughts on “Pure Evil”

  2. I was stationed in a maintenance company in West Germany during the mid 70’s. In our vehicle repair shop, one of the sergeants would ride shotgun on the final road test of a deuce-and-s-half truck driven by the FNG mechanic who had worked on it. The sergeant would palm his metal cigarette lighter, and a hundred or so yards down the road, start surreptitiously tapping his lighter on the metal seat frame in time to the engine rpm.

  4. Before the snow started falling in Alaska, you’d get out all the cold weather stuff like the Yukon stoves and ahkios and ten-man tents to make sure everything was ready when The Hawk (winter) arrived. Once the tent was spread out, one of the rookies would be sent to the supply room to requisition a replacement rope wrench from the supply sergeant “and don’t put up with his B.S. that he don’t got none because we all know he does so don’t dare come back without one.”

    We also had the Alaska version of a snipe hunt where we’d get all the rookies together and have a fake “moose guard” with a duty roster and a Sergeant of the Moose Guard and everything and they’d be out there in the snow yelling “go away, moose, go away” half the night until somebody would get tired of the noise and tell them they’d been scammed.

  5. When he is done with that, send him for a pair of replacement bubbles for the spirit level, one left, one right.

    • An Industrial Ed classmate relayed how he was tasked to find a new level bubble at work. He took off with purpose and stayed gone until 4:30. His betters were fuming, but they had to eat crow when he provided a jar of soapy water and said take your pick!

  6. A friend ran a construction crew and they had the FNG convinced that if the extension cord wasn’t laid out straight the electricity couldn’t flow. The shop teacher at the local high school’s favorite thing was to send a freshman to the local lumber yard and ask for a board stretcher whereupon the owner of the yard would ask, left hand or right hand? Another fella I worked with once told of when he as a 40 year old started a new job welding and was sent to the tool room for a rod stretcher. He said he decided to go along with the joke and to his surprise when he asked for a rod stretcher, he was handed one.

  7. The actual joke is on the old fools who find tired, repetitive jokes funny while their victim will one day walk past their graves and not give a shit.

  9. That’s funny shit right thar.

    Dammit, accidentally threw my grease gun away the other day but that’s okay they’ll make more.

  10. And then, send the new kid to the fridge for a nicely chilled bottle of refreshing Exhaust Fluid…

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