Not even if I could, which there is no fucking way.

Went out to have a smoke with my coffee before work and found this.

And it’s still coming down.

The back tires on the truck are overdue to be replaced as is, they spin just pulling away from stop lights when it’s wet and The Wifely Unit was supposed to drive over to Sandy to take care of her Dad for the week.

That ain’t gonna happen now. I will probably wind up taking her and dropping her off after I get home.

Assuming I can get to work and back. There are going to be unlimited morons out there, I can feel it.

I gotta go.

Thanks again Grog, the insulated coveralls have been broken out. I am leaving way early to give myself plenty of time.

April 11th and it’s snowing.

The next asshole who opens his mouth and Global Warming comes out…..

Dirty sonofabitch just keeps throwing sliders and curve balls at me.

I will win, eventually.

No matter how much “Shit That Bubba Did” I run into.

I got a text message from one of the Sister In Laws this morning at 0830 stating that the battery in her car was dead.

This is the same one who was complaining about her battery a week ago.

She is obviously not smart enough to take care of this on a Saturday, her day off, when most places are open, eh?

No, let’s wait until Sunday Morning and then call Phil and make it his problem.

Fuck me runnin’, this is why it’s illegal to bitch slap people.

Because it should be legal in instances such as this.

It starts out with her wanting to know if there is anybody, on a Sunday mind you, that will come to your house and change out a battery.

WTF?

The ONLY outfit that I know of that does that shit is Triple A.

Fuck no, she don’t have that, of course.

After I explain that, I tell her that Auto Zone will change out your battery in their parking lot if you can get it there.

Of course this still means that I have to drive the fuck over there and jump start the fucking thing.

I thought about all this for about ten whole seconds and said fuck all this bullshit, I’m not dealing with the potential of the thing dying on the way over to the nearest Auto Zone, or them not having the right battery and then me having to go jump start the fucker again, I’m just going to go buy a fucking battery, drive over there and change the motherfucker out in her damn driveway, because again, she is too fucking stupid to take care of this shit on her own.

Now the Wifely Unit chimes in and calls me stupid for doing this and yadda yadda yadda.

Fuck this noise, see ya later.

I go get the battery, drive over there and the very first thing thing I get to do is fuck around with massive corrosion on the hold down clamp, then clean the gross terminals, swap the fucking battery out, test the charging system, have her start it and shut it off and have her try it again.

Nothing.

Not a click, nothing.

I check the connections and they are good. The battery is good, try it again.

Vrooom, it fires right up.

Repeat this a couple of times and it did it again but then started right up on the second try.

Then it started up several times in a row.

I dunno if she has an ignition switch acting up or if she just wasn’t pushing the clutch pedal down far enough.

Either way, I tells her I am done here.

The old battery was older than shit and it was definitely bad so it needed changing either way.

Of course I chewed her ass for not taking care of this shit yesterday and waiting to dump it in my lap on a Sunday morning.

Like I don’t have enough shit to deal with.

She ate the core charge for my trouble so there is that. Then she did pay me in cash for the battery.

I told her flat out that if she has anymore trouble with the fucker that she is on her own. I absolutely do not have time to fuck with it.

A 2008 Toyota Corolla with 245,000 miles on it?

Oh HELL no!