I Swear They Do That Shit On Purpose

It never fails either.

Every. Single. Time., I go into a Big Box Store like Lowes or Home Depot looking for something, if I can even find it at all, it’s usually in some weird place.

Take for example my latest debacle.

I head to the local Lowes looking for a length of thin gauge 2 inch Aluminum Angle.

8 foot if I can find it.

So I have a question for you.

If it was you and you went into one of these places looking for one of those, where would you think to start looking?

Home and Garden?

Electrical?

Bed and Bath?

How about maybe… Building Supplies?

That would make sense wouldn’t it?

An 8 foot long hunk of Aluminum Angle?

I would think that makes sense, if they even have any at all, right?

But No.

I wound up having to ask some guy that works there and even he had to look it up.

On aisle 4 he says.

Thank you very much.

I head to aisle 4 and what do I see?

Fasteners.

Nuts, screws, bolts and all manner of little drawers full of weird shit like furniture hardware and Rubber Stoppers.

But wait, down at the other end of the aisle they have this little section with their massively over priced cut offs of shit like regular Angle Iron, All Thread and little short chunks of various types of metal. Next to that they have this tall vertical rack that spins around and there it is.

Clear on the other side of this huge fucking store from the Building Materials.

Because that makes absolute sense, to someone.

That someone being a Can’t Understand Normal Thinking type of someone.

It just boggles my mind that someone thinks metal materials belong next to the Wood Screws instead of next to the Iron Pipe and other Building Materials.

It’s like the time I went in this same store and looked for a can of fucking WD-40 for 15 minutes.

Know where they stashed that shit?

I had to ask for that one too because I couldn’t find it in either the Paint or the Chemicals/Cleaners section.

In the Hand Tools section next to the Hammers and Screwdrivers.

Because that makes absolute sense too, to the same stupid fucking cunt that decided to put 8 foot long sections of Aluminum Angle next to the Wood Screws.

10 thoughts on “I Swear They Do That Shit On Purpose

  1. My last experience like that was at Lowes.
    I was looking for that rope like gasket to seal a door on a wood stove.
    I gave up looking and had to ask for the location.
    Well what a dumb ass I must be. It was in the garden section on the shelf right there next to the Miracle Grow just above the potting soil.
    At least I know for the next time. Oh and to add insult to injury, I had to drive 200 miles just for the thrill of it.

    • Deadray, I didn’t know that Lowes had a branch at the North Pole! Did you find a bed for both your Sasquatch and your dog in the pets section?

  2. That is why they won’t hire us old tool farts and old tradesmen and material guys. We would get their shit squared away with in three days and have a successful store where people can find what they are looking for and get some good advice about their projects and how to PROPERLY repair a problem in electrical, plumbing, building and possibly HVAC if we have a heating guy. My brother retired and just wanted a part time job at Lowes or Homo Depot. he retired as an Air-flow Engineer designing cooking air hoods for subs, Navy ships, restaurants and fast food joints. They didn’t want to hire him, afraid of asking for too much money and being able to give sound advice…

  3. I used to be exactly like you. Now I search online, find what I want, then have them text it to me on my phone and tells me exactly where it’s at.

  4. So, after many many many trips to the local Lowes, I had the entire layout of the store fricking memorized. I knew it better than any employee. Know what they did last month? Yup, reorganized and rearranged the entire fricking store so now I can’t find a damn thing.
    My wife says the grocery store does the same thing. She’s been going to the same store long enough that when she writes her list, she writes in order of the aisles cause she knows where everything is. Until once again they rearrange stuff. Really sets her off, too.

  5. Here’s something similar AT MY LOCAL GROCERY STORE.

    Single serve energy bars vs bulk pack energy bar stocking locations are in two different places in the store, all brands. The bulk packs of energy bars are located in the cereal aisle. The single serve, i.e. buy them by the each bar, are located … wait for it … in the medical supplies aisle next to the vitamins and across the aisle from the feminine hygiene products. BTW the med. supplies aisle is six aisles east of the cereal aisle.

  6. The fasteners and the metal stock come from the same vendor.

    Not an excuse, just the reason, don’t shoot the messenger.

  7. I think all the big box stores do this. The people working in them that have to place the stock have scant clue what the item is used for. The zone assistants might know, but not the night shift putting up stock.

    My favorite bitch is that if I go to the store to purchase a Ryobi brand cordless tool, it would be logical to put all Ryobi products in one aisle, aye? Noooo way.

    Ryobi is scattered by the end function (sort of) of the item and placed all over the effing place. This forces you to have to go to plumbing, garden, power (corded) and battery (separate aisles don’cha know) and if it is drills, bits and like all that is in yet another aisle.
    Want a power caulk gun, paint area. Want a drill, go over 5 aisles to battery hand tools. Want a circular saw, whoops, that is on the other aisle over (am just waiting for them to decide to place those in the lumber aisles)..

    Makes you waste time hoofing all over the store. Am sure that is intentional but not efficient for the guy with a specific set of targets.

  8. Well, first off, I don’t go to Lowes or Home Depot for metals, I go to Tacoma Metals for angle, sheet, and other sundries.

    But I see your point.

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