10 thoughts on “I have no nice thing to say about JWs.”
Answering the door with a drawn pentagram on the floor and lit candles will most definitely run them off. I thought they were going to hurt themselves trying to get off my porch, which is what they get when they bang on my door at 8 a.m. on a Sunday morning after I have been out until 5 a.m. partying.
Wife allowed one gal into the house for a Bible study session. For the longest time afterward all JWs covering the area would walk on the other side of the street to get past our house.
Just on the odd chance that any of the readers might be interested in purchasing such a geegaw(or gewgaw according to Mr. Webster), I did a quick search:
Years ago I was working night shift and 3 weeks in a row they showed up at 9am Tuesday morning wanting to talk. The third week I answered the door in my underware. After they stopped for a couple of years then came again except in the afternoon. My wife answered that time and told them to wait a minute while she got her Bible then kept them on the porch for an hour and a half asking questions and and showing them them the biblical answer. That was 30 years ago and they still haven’t been back.
Awhile back I had a GF that was a Missouri Synod Lutheran. Her mother, a real Granny Clampett type, had a visit from the JWs. She was shocked at what they had to say, but was prepared for the next visit.
They left abruptly, but she followed them up the sidewalk, shoving bible tracts at them. They never came back, but I can’t help but think about this scene at the local Kingdom Hall: “Johnson’s having some problems with humility lately; he thinks he’s ready to pitch shit in the big leagues. Send him to see the Scroggins Woman.”
Years ago, as kids Mt brother and I were out in the woods near our rural home shooting our .22 rifles. Saw them get out and knock on the door. Nobody was at the house, so we started down the road with rifles in hand. They saw us coming and ran to the car, and threw gravel as they passed us. Apparently, they weren’t used to converting young armed teenagers.
Chased some away when they were carrying on about the Evils of The Catholic Church!!! Told them I wasn’t catholic, but a papist. Confused the shit out of them.
Knew an old rancher in Montana. There was a cliff behind his house and he would prop up a dummy dressed in blue jeans and a shirt on the rocks. It looked just like a person sitting above the cliff watching the house. When the JWs showed up, he’d casually look around while talking to them and then look up at the cliff at the dummy. He’d yell out, “You sonofabitch! I told you to stay the hell out of here!” Then he’d grab a rifle and start shooting at the dummy. They got gone real quick
Answering the door with a drawn pentagram on the floor and lit candles will most definitely run them off. I thought they were going to hurt themselves trying to get off my porch, which is what they get when they bang on my door at 8 a.m. on a Sunday morning after I have been out until 5 a.m. partying.
Wife allowed one gal into the house for a Bible study session. For the longest time afterward all JWs covering the area would walk on the other side of the street to get past our house.
Just on the odd chance that any of the readers might be interested in purchasing such a geegaw(or gewgaw according to Mr. Webster), I did a quick search:
https://www.amazon.com/Bronzed-Door-Knocker-Balls-Doorballs/dp/B00RCAPMLI
Yes, suck a thing actually exists and No, I have no financial interest in the product or the company that makes them.
Some people and their kinks!
Years ago I was working night shift and 3 weeks in a row they showed up at 9am Tuesday morning wanting to talk. The third week I answered the door in my underware. After they stopped for a couple of years then came again except in the afternoon. My wife answered that time and told them to wait a minute while she got her Bible then kept them on the porch for an hour and a half asking questions and and showing them them the biblical answer. That was 30 years ago and they still haven’t been back.
Awhile back I had a GF that was a Missouri Synod Lutheran. Her mother, a real Granny Clampett type, had a visit from the JWs. She was shocked at what they had to say, but was prepared for the next visit.
They left abruptly, but she followed them up the sidewalk, shoving bible tracts at them. They never came back, but I can’t help but think about this scene at the local Kingdom Hall: “Johnson’s having some problems with humility lately; he thinks he’s ready to pitch shit in the big leagues. Send him to see the Scroggins Woman.”
Years ago, as kids Mt brother and I were out in the woods near our rural home shooting our .22 rifles. Saw them get out and knock on the door. Nobody was at the house, so we started down the road with rifles in hand. They saw us coming and ran to the car, and threw gravel as they passed us. Apparently, they weren’t used to converting young armed teenagers.
Chased some away when they were carrying on about the Evils of The Catholic Church!!! Told them I wasn’t catholic, but a papist. Confused the shit out of them.
Knew an old rancher in Montana. There was a cliff behind his house and he would prop up a dummy dressed in blue jeans and a shirt on the rocks. It looked just like a person sitting above the cliff watching the house. When the JWs showed up, he’d casually look around while talking to them and then look up at the cliff at the dummy. He’d yell out, “You sonofabitch! I told you to stay the hell out of here!” Then he’d grab a rifle and start shooting at the dummy. They got gone real quick
There’s a kid in our neighborhood- he is dyslexic and his mom is JW and dad is a Unitarian.
Thing is he keeps walking through the neighborhood, knocking on doors, telling people about dog, but he doesn’t know why…