Not only am I beat, I am in so much pain that I can’t hardly navigate.

This little episode actually started about three weeks ago.

I was trying to mow the lawn and my riding mower took a giant shit on me.

I knew the mower deck was in bad shape and have occasionally been trying to find a replacement for it.

Well, it was in worse shape than I thought.

This rusted out hole in the picture below is what is left after the front support rod rotted out and pulled clear off the deck

I was wondering why it kept feeling like I was running over something and getting hung up whenever I had to back up.

The Wifely Unit spotted the entire rod dangling off the front while I was in the driveway trying to lube up the blade engagement cable that was sticking.

When I saw that I knew I was screwed and went to just go drive it back into the side yard so I could get serious about finding another used deck.

Well just for fun, while I was messing around, the drive belt also came off after it got hung upon the mower deck brackets when the thing fell in the driveway. Me and The Wife wound up pushing the damn thing around two cars, the garbage cans and back up into the side yard. That fucking killed my ass.

My legs were screaming at me and I damn near collapsed. I had to wait over five minutes just so I could get up and walk back into the house.

Since then I have been all over Craigslist and Facebook Marketplace trying to find another deck for this thing. Maybe even an entire different mower.

I have seen at least six decks and three mowers that were for sale in the three weeks since then.

Par for the course, I either get no answer, no return email or the phone call gets sent straight to voicemail and then I get the “this mailbox is full” message and can’t even leave a number for them to call me back at.

I found a mower that looked to be just a couple miles away two weeks ago and got no answer.

Last Thursday I found a mower fifty miles away that supposedly had a bad transmission.

The lady wanted way too much for the thing, $350 but I was getting desperate.

While I am in the middle of trying to send her a message on Markeptplace, my phone rings.

Turns out it is the guy that had the mower a couple miles away. The ad had expired already.

This old dude tells me he is currently in Colorado, had forgotten to pull the ad and had sold it three weeks ago anyway. He just wanted to let me know.

What The Actual Fuck man? So I go back to this lady on Marketplace and go back ad forth with her.

She says Sunday is good for her.

So Friday after work, I had a buddy follow me home and we dragged my little trailer out from the side of the house and got it into the driveway so I could weld some fenders on the little fucker that I had custom bent at work out of some scrap 3/16’s plate a few moths ago.

First I had to pressure wash about half an apple tree’s worth of dead leaves and shit off of it.

Dragged everything out of the garage, measured and cut some 1 inch square tube I had and commenced to welding the damn fenders on so I could drag the thing fifty miles one way to get this mower.

Got done with all that just as it was getting dark Friday night after working all week.

That kicked my fucking ass too.

Lifting and dragging tools, laying on the ground to weld the supports and the fenders on and then putting everything away, I was wiped out by the time I got in the house.

I didn’t sleep for shit that night because I had horrible leg cramps all night.

Got up Saturday in so much pain I couldn’t hardly walk and went out to get the trailer light wiring sorted out. Three hours later I had marker lights and one brake/turn light working. Needs a sealed light assembly on the passenger side,

Then had to go to Washougal to a charity auction at a tavern that my Sister In Law has put on for the last twenty years.

It was hot and we were sitting outside..

It wasn’t too long and I wasn’t feeling good and had a headache.

When it got worse and I really felt like crap I figured out the heat was kicking my ass so I started drinking ice water and went and crashed in the car.

The Wifely Unit took her sisters and she had a blast. They were pounding Jello Shots and she got lit up and wound up spending a crazy amount of money.

It’s her money but I made sure to tell her that I didn’t want to hear another word about how much I was prepared to spend on this mower I was going to go get because she had been giving me shit about it.

I finally left here there at almost nine o’clock and brought our oldest boy home while she continued to party with her sisters,

I got up this morning, hooked up the trailer, threw in a Come Along, some nylon straps, a chain with hooks a little floor jack and went to the bank to get the money for this mower I was going to look at.

One hour and fifty miles later, I pull up, get out and knock on the door.

This ditzy looking little lady answers the door and we walk ten feet down the driveway to look at this mower with a bad transmission.

I took one look at at it, said “No Thanks” and started to walk away. What’s the matter she asked?

The mower deck on this thing is so rotten and full of holes I couldn’t even tell you what was holding it off the ground still.

Way worse than mine!

So I got in the truck and came home.

While I was driving I came to the conclusion that I was just going to gave to try and patch up the one I got until I can find a used one, hopefully soon.

Got home, backed the trailer in, went and unhooked the mower deck and hauled it around to the front of the garage and threw it on the back of the trailer. Dragged the grinders and welder out, snagged a hunk of thin sheet steel and started cutting and grinding patches for the damn thing.

I’m gonna warn you, the results are horrifyingly ugly.

I am not a fabricator and I am not a welder. I have a nice wire feed welder but no gas bottle so I had to use cheap assed Harbor Freight Flux Core wire.

I still have one whole side left to do but as ugly as it is, it should at least be able to mount back up under the mower and cut the now overgrown lawn when I get done tomorrow after work.

If, I get it done and IF, I can get it all back together before falling over,

Yeah it’s ugly. I still have the other side to do yet too.

I’m so tired I can barely keep my head up but I gotta go take the garbage and recycling out now.

So now ya know why I didn’t post anything all weekend.

I was pretty damn busy.