I, Hypocrite

I started stealing cigarettes from my parents once in a while clear back in 1970 when I was 10 years old.

By that time I was already a veteran beer drinker and was also swiping my old mans Seagrams 7 and McNaughtens whiskey and downing it straight

So basically 55 years I have been a documented delinquent.

I have quit smoking a couple of times, once for over a year. That was back in the late 80’s when the cheeky bastards at the convenience stores started putting cigarettes in a cup next to the register and selling them for 10 cents.

One thin dime and I was off to the races again.

I have quit a couple times since but after a while started in again. Currently, I haven’t smoked a cigarette since the morning of my last surgery, March 17th.

I am using a Vape the wife gave me but even with that I am not ingesting even half of the nicotine I was , plus none of that tar and other crap that go with cigarettes.

What may have inspired this post and that headline you may ask?

My damn truck..

Every time I have gotten in that damn thing since the surgery the inside of the truck has smelled like a giant rolling ashtray.

The reek would just slam you in the face every time I opened the door.

I finally couldn’t stand it anymore so today I opened that ashtray up and cleaned it out. Along with several butts and a bunch of ashes all over the place.

I almost feel bad because it was a virgin when I bought the truck but whatever.

So hopefully that stink will be gone now. If not, there are escalating steps that can be taken…

An Overdue Thank You

I have a cousin who used to live here in Washington, Washougal to be exact.

He is the reason I moved over here from Portland after I graduated college back in 1991.

He offered me a place to live at his house and we were roomies for a couple of years at least.

His name is Mark and he is a Stand Up guy.

He came in to town last weekend for a family matter and while he is here, he swung by and did a shit ton of yard work for me that I haven’t been able to do. I dug out the weed eater and got it going and he went to town.

Again.

I say again because he was in town last year when I sent out a plea for help and a whole bunch of friends and family showed up to clean the yard. Last year there was 9 of us total and it took 6 hours and 3 trips to the recycling place with yard debris to get the joint cleaned up.

I used to do it all by myself but those days are gone.

Mark is two weeks older than my younger brother and has been more like a brother than a cousin for a long time.

He reads the Blog to keep up with me because he lives in Texas now after he got married to a wonderful woman.

So Thank You again my man, it’s always great to see you and I’m looking forward to catching you again before you head back home.

Lova ya dude.

St. Louis Woman Twerking on Roof of Cadillac Slips Off and Is Run Over by a Fire Truck

Sent in by Brad in Illinois.

A St. Louis woman was killed on Saturday night after she slid off the roof of a Cadillac Escalade while twerking and was run over by a St. Louis fire truck heading to an emergency.

The woman, identified as Nyla Simmons, was killed at the intersection of South Compton and Chouteau around 11:30 PM.

Nila slid off the roof when the Escalade turned left. She hit the cement and was then run over by the fire truck.

The St. Louis Metropolitan Police released this statement on Sunday morning.

St. Louis Metropolitan Police release a statement on the death of Nila Simmons who was killed when she slid off her Cadillac and was run over by fire truck.

I have no comment …