yup. wish I could say different. but it is the reason why I no longer talk with them.
my one sister did everything she could to get my parents money short of putting a pillow over my mom face while she was sleeping. if I never see them again it will be too soon. I don’t think I going to regret it either. I already heard them talking about splitting up my stuff when I kick off. it does kind of piss a person off when you overhear shit like that. already got a iron clad will set up and they don’t get shit. I tell you one thing, I do regret ever helping them out in the past.
kind of funny as when I needed a little help, they where no where to be found.
From my observations there always seems to be one child with the compassion to take care of their parents. I did for mine first then my in-laws. Mother in law was astounded and would inquire as to how I could do it. My only answer was a gift from God and love for them.
A good trust lawyer is a valuable thing. My Dad’s cousin was pretty wealthy but the lawyer set it up where backs would have to be scratched to change things.
My Dad wasn’t wealthy but I was trustee and my oldest brother started causing problems till I restated the timeline activities. We remained close till his dying day.
Character shows up at the reading of the will.
Wife and I just signed papers yesterday, re-doing our trust and wills.
If anyone contests it, they get removed entirely.
I’m an only child so had no siblings to fight with, of course that meant no relief pitcher for me either. Bought a condo for them to live in so they just had to pay utilities and taxes and not have to maintain property. After I retired, bought a big enough home for them to move in with us. Dad was able to stay home with us through his terminal cancer and died at home. Mom lived with us for another 7 years, had a stroke and died in rehab. Would never consider putting either in a nursing home since I spent my late teens working in one. At least I know I did the best I could and have no regrets.
Good on you Hank. None of my parents went to nursing homes for the very reason you knew not to.
Well for me and my siblings none of them want anything to do with my mother but they’re sure there with their hands out if it looks like there is any money.
That completely changes when it comes to my family. I’ve been flat on my back for going on 28 days and my kids have taken time off from work and given up vacation days to make sure one of them is here to take care of my smallest need, every single day.
We’ve talked about who wants what in passing but none of them, other than my youngest daughter has staked claim to my old 03A3, has made any serious requests. But then again we are a different family and the kids were raised up for a family structure that doesn’t really exist anymore.
wes
wtdb
I’ll never ask my kids to take care of me.
When my time is up it is up.
Four of them may happily divvy up what I earned in my life.
The fifth, sorry, YOU refuse to work, you aren’t going to benefit of MY work.
(While holding up his hand for me to ‘pay for college’ when I explained him about hard work and responsibility he responded: “dad, but maybe I don’t agree with your life style”.
I guess we can figure out who HE votes for.
My father was an orphan. He was an absolute animal when he met my mom, who civilized him. His health gave out early, and my mom took good care of him. His instructions to my mom were absolutely perfect when it came to their will. After she passed on, everything divided evenly on the basis of its’ cash value. There was no argument or discussion, just my dad’s plan and their will.
My siblings and I are among the only people we know of who never had a single days’ grief or discontent over inheritance.
My most problematic brother, who did time, was an addict, and finally found sobriety after blowing up his own life and marriage, spent 10 years living with my parents and caring for them, and rebuilding his life in the process. Caring for them in their decline as each approached death came at a high cost for him and aged him, but saved him, too. It gave him great empathy in his own personality.
I’ve got just the one kid, and he knows that I don’t want to have him sacrifice his future for my wife and I, and so I hopefully will never need to rely on him for help. He knows he doesn’t have to divide anything up, which is one potential trap averted.
yup. wish I could say different. but it is the reason why I no longer talk with them.
my one sister did everything she could to get my parents money short of putting a pillow over my mom face while she was sleeping. if I never see them again it will be too soon. I don’t think I going to regret it either. I already heard them talking about splitting up my stuff when I kick off. it does kind of piss a person off when you overhear shit like that. already got a iron clad will set up and they don’t get shit. I tell you one thing, I do regret ever helping them out in the past.
kind of funny as when I needed a little help, they where no where to be found.
From my observations there always seems to be one child with the compassion to take care of their parents. I did for mine first then my in-laws. Mother in law was astounded and would inquire as to how I could do it. My only answer was a gift from God and love for them.
A good trust lawyer is a valuable thing. My Dad’s cousin was pretty wealthy but the lawyer set it up where backs would have to be scratched to change things.
My Dad wasn’t wealthy but I was trustee and my oldest brother started causing problems till I restated the timeline activities. We remained close till his dying day.
Character shows up at the reading of the will.
Wife and I just signed papers yesterday, re-doing our trust and wills.
If anyone contests it, they get removed entirely.
I’m an only child so had no siblings to fight with, of course that meant no relief pitcher for me either. Bought a condo for them to live in so they just had to pay utilities and taxes and not have to maintain property. After I retired, bought a big enough home for them to move in with us. Dad was able to stay home with us through his terminal cancer and died at home. Mom lived with us for another 7 years, had a stroke and died in rehab. Would never consider putting either in a nursing home since I spent my late teens working in one. At least I know I did the best I could and have no regrets.
Good on you Hank. None of my parents went to nursing homes for the very reason you knew not to.
Well for me and my siblings none of them want anything to do with my mother but they’re sure there with their hands out if it looks like there is any money.
That completely changes when it comes to my family. I’ve been flat on my back for going on 28 days and my kids have taken time off from work and given up vacation days to make sure one of them is here to take care of my smallest need, every single day.
We’ve talked about who wants what in passing but none of them, other than my youngest daughter has staked claim to my old 03A3, has made any serious requests. But then again we are a different family and the kids were raised up for a family structure that doesn’t really exist anymore.
wes
wtdb
I’ll never ask my kids to take care of me.
When my time is up it is up.
Four of them may happily divvy up what I earned in my life.
The fifth, sorry, YOU refuse to work, you aren’t going to benefit of MY work.
(While holding up his hand for me to ‘pay for college’ when I explained him about hard work and responsibility he responded: “dad, but maybe I don’t agree with your life style”.
I guess we can figure out who HE votes for.
My father was an orphan. He was an absolute animal when he met my mom, who civilized him. His health gave out early, and my mom took good care of him. His instructions to my mom were absolutely perfect when it came to their will. After she passed on, everything divided evenly on the basis of its’ cash value. There was no argument or discussion, just my dad’s plan and their will.
My siblings and I are among the only people we know of who never had a single days’ grief or discontent over inheritance.
My most problematic brother, who did time, was an addict, and finally found sobriety after blowing up his own life and marriage, spent 10 years living with my parents and caring for them, and rebuilding his life in the process. Caring for them in their decline as each approached death came at a high cost for him and aged him, but saved him, too. It gave him great empathy in his own personality.
I’ve got just the one kid, and he knows that I don’t want to have him sacrifice his future for my wife and I, and so I hopefully will never need to rely on him for help. He knows he doesn’t have to divide anything up, which is one potential trap averted.